I am a liar.
I lie to those around me all of the time. More disturbingly I lie to myself all of the time.
Fear has always really held me back from realising my true potential. Traditionally I have always taken the easy safe road rather than the road that I was destined to follow.
The one thing that I promised to myself this year before any of this began is that I would stop hiding and be all in. Even though it has felt really uncomfortable at times it is my approach to life and all its challenges that I am the most proud of.
I look back this year and I think – ‘holy shit’ I have smashed even what I thought possible for myself. I can genuinely say that I have never ever been close to thinking that before. This is a great thing.
And yet I feel I am still not telling the truth to myself and to those around me. Have I really been all in? Have I really ignored the fear? Deep down I don’t really think so.
I have still made excuses and not taken every road I could have taken. I have still stepped back when I could have stepped forward. I have still made excuses. I have still not lived up to my true potential.
And there are many excuses we make to lie to ourselves about realising our potential as human beings.
We lie that somehow when we say we need more talent than we were born with or that we are not good enough.
The truth is that there isn’t anyone that is reaching their potential. We live in a world where all the barriers to potential are disappearing all of the time. Our individual potential is becoming limitless and all that truly remains is the barriers that we place on ourselves.
We lie somehow when we say it is easy for them or if only I had this.
The truth is that we are the same as everyone else. There isn’t a person in this world that isn’t dealing with something. There isn’t a person in this world that does not have a shadow behind the light. There isn’t a human being that isn’t human. There is no such thing as perfect or superhuman.
We lie when we wait for permission or wait to be chosen or wait for someone else.
The truth is that we don’t need permission to live the life that we want. We don’t need to wait to be chosen. We don’t need to hide at the back behind everyone else saying I can’t or I won’t.
We lie when we say that we are not afraid.
The the real truth is that we are very afraid. I am afraid. Afraid to stand out, afraid to take a make a fuss, afraid to lead, afraid to trust and above all afraid to really stand up and be prepared to fail
For me I am fed up with making excuses about what could have been or should have been if only this or that. I am tired of convincing myself that the easy road is not just a way of kidding myself for walking the safe road.
My intent is to walk my true path. And yes there will be some days where I lie and make excuses without even realising it. And yes there will be some days life scares the shit out of me and I will will have to turn back.
Yet I will accept the difference between the excuse and the reality. I will accept that the excuse is just a way of hiding from my reality. I will accept that the reality is that I CAN do this and I am choosing not do rather than I can’t.
The reality is that the road I take may be a long and sometimes hard road. The place I am heading is a place of peace, ease and freedom and I know it is on other side of that fear I walks towards.
To get me there requires me to take leap of faith. A fundamental belief in myself. A blind trust that I can find my own way in the dark.
I will use fear as my guide. Wherever I feel it, I will be walking towards it.
My own road is the only road worth taking. I hope to see you on it some day.
Marc
(Based on wonderfully tough conversations last week and a blog post by Seth Godin)
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I agree on so many levels and wonder if it can be more organic, tempered, methodical… Some days you can’t be all in so the next day you truly can… My 2 cents!!!
Hey Cassia. Sure, I think all in can ebb and flow and be organic. It may not have come across in the post but it is very much about listening to true feelings on the inside rather than the mind chatter of fear. There are times when we freeze when our hearts are telling us to be bold. Likewise there are times when we know we should relax and our minds are telling us we ought to be doing more for the sake of doing more. Ultimately it is about being truly committed to being you whatever that means.
Thanks for discussing The Lies I Tell and The Excuses
I Make · The View Inside Me.